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Opium Tea
Opium Tea

Diluting the trans panic with satirical gender fluid.

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Opium Tea
Opium Tea

Diluting the trans panic with satirical gender fluid.

Bluesky Email Patreon Buy Me a Coffee PayPal
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Julie Bindel loses Taskmaster final after failing visual metaphor round.

Julie Bindel narrowly missed out on victory in Season 20 of Taskmaster by scoring zero points in a prop-based visual metaphor task. Reading aloud from the task handed to her by ringleader Alex Horne, Julie stated “Construct a visual metaphor…

  • opiumtea_bofs1x
  • November 14, 2025
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Reduxx co-founders accidentally befriend each other’s paedophile-hunting personas.

Genevieve Gluck and Anna Slatz are the co-founders and chief contributors of Reduxx, a website devoted to trawling the global internet for examples of child sexual abuse that can be attributed to the transgender community. This can be gruelling and…

  • opiumtea_bofs1x
  • November 13, 2025
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Judith Butler’s flatmate blames string of cake thefts on impenetrability of discourse.

Lisa Meyer, long-time friend and flatmate of feminist scholar Judith Butler, attributed a string of recent food thefts to a misunderstanding due to the incomprehensibility of the Cleveland academic’s writing, a claim Judith views with some suspicion. “A dear friend…

  • opiumtea_bofs1x
  • November 12, 2025
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Cognitive Scientists Discover Helen Joyce Able to Recognise Reflection.

Helen Joyce has been found to be able to recognise herself in a mirror, passing a test of self-recognition generally only achieved by some humans, apes and bottlenose dolphins.  Dr Alexandra MacLennan, a senior researcher at the Cognitive Science Society,…

  • opiumtea_bofs1x
  • November 11, 2025
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‘Sex Matters’ enlist James Esses for youth education group ‘Sex With Children’.

An idea first conceived in the aftermath of her Landmark legal victory against Stonewall has finally come to fruition, as feminist trailblazer Maya Forstater has announced the formation of a new organisation dedicated to providing accurate sex-based education for young…

  • opiumtea_bofs1x
  • November 10, 2025
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Man with orange for a head to sue genie responsible for granting wish

A young British man who had his head replaced with a giant orange as part of a trilogy of wishes granted by a lamp-dwelling genie is suing the Arabian spirit in a historic legal action. He complains the genie did…

  • opiumtea_bofs1x
  • September 1, 2025
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‘Giggle’ founder Sall Grover under fire as members’ skull measurements leaked in security breach.

Giggle markets itself as an online space “designed to give girls choice, control and connection”, with no men allowed on the app. The sign-up process involves a biometric scan in which the contours of the applicant’s skull are measured to…

  • opiumtea_bofs1x
  • August 2, 2025
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Animal psychologists discover crows able to understand transphobic humour.

Researchers at the University of Iowa, having previously established that crows and ravens are able to understand analogical thinking, have taken their findings a step further with the discovery that crows are able to comprehend and participate in transphobic humour,…

  • opiumtea_bofs1x
  • August 1, 2025
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JK Rowling’s editor begs protestors not to inspire another fucking crime novel.

JK Rowling’s literary editor Geoff Bishop today issued a heartfelt plea for the protestors who were recently photographed outside the bestselling author’s Aberfeldy estate to please leave Ms Rowling alone, lest she be inspired to write another fucking crime fiction…

  • opiumtea_bofs1x
  • April 8, 2025
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Harry ‘The Owl’ Miller takes to the skies in ACME rainbow extraction machine.

‘We Are Fair Cop’ founder and amateur aviation enthusiast Harry “The Owl” Miller has taken to the skies in his latest battle against the politicisation of British aerospace, in an ACME-brand rainbow-extracting flying machine designed to preserve the integrity of…

  • opiumtea_bofs1x
  • March 18, 2025
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